Joy Is Everywhere

Bob is opening his bar one day and is amazed to see a gorilla sitting in the oak tree in front of his establishment.He carefully walks into his bar and wastes no time looking up “Gorilla Removal” in the yellow pages. He calls the service, and in nothing flat a truck pulls up with the words “JOE’s GORILLA REMOVAL”
written on the side.

A man gets out of the truck carrying a loaded pistol and he has a fierce looking German shepherd on a leash.

“Now here’s the plan,” Joe tells Bob. “You hold the gun and I’ll climb up the tree and shake the big ape out. When the gorilla falls to the ground, the German shepherd will attack him and go for his
private parts. After that, I just throw him in the back of my truck. Any questions?”

“Just one,” says Bob. “What’s the gun for?”

“If I fall out of the tree, shoot the dog!”

Contributed by: Sylvia and the archives

Jolene had been wanting new kitchen cabinets for a long time, but her husband insisted they were an extravagance.She went to visit her Mother for two weeks, and when she returned, she was overjoyed to find that beautiful new cabinets had been installed.

A few days later a neighbor came over to visit and after admiring the new cabinets, the neighbor added, “All of us were so glad that the fire your husband had while you were gone was confined to the kitchen.”

Contributed by: Sefton